What your other half is saying about you

TWO female friends are catching up. “So, how was your evening last night?”

“A disaster! After getting home, my dear beloved hubby wolfed down in four minutes, the dinner that took me all afternoon to prepare, ‘granted’ me three minutes of passionate love before rolling over and falling asleep two minutes later. And you?”

“Oh, mine was incredible. My hubby was waiting for me to get back home from work. He took me out for a very romantic dinner. We then walked back home, under an amazing starry sky, along the canal, for a good two hours. Once home, he lit up all the candles we had and our foreplay lasted for an hour. We then made love for another hour and then we chatted until late. It was wonderful.”

Meanwhile, at work, the husbands are ‘networking’. “So, how was your evening last night?”

“Great! When I came home, the food was ready. I ate, we shagged and I fell asleep. You?”

“A nightmare! I came home earlier to fix the kitchen shelf. When I switched on the power drill, the fuse went out. The whole house went into darkness.
 Couldn’t find the bloody fuse-box, so when my better half arrived, I took her out.
 It was the only thing to do to avoid getting an earful. Dinner was so expensive that I couldn’t afford the taxi back home, so we had to walk home. Once there, the house was still in the dark, obviously, so I had to light all these fucking candles to avoid knocking everything down. I was so wound up that it took me an hour to get a hard on, and another one to come. In the end, I was so pissed off that it took me ages to fall asleep, while she kept yapping on and on about everything and nothing…”