Frustrated Husbands

FRUSTRATED husband in front of his laptop: Dear Google, please do not behave like my wife. Please allow me to complete my sentence before you start guessing and suggesting.

A frustrated husband’s prayer: Dear God, You gave me childhood; You took it away. You gave me youth; You took it away. You gave me a wife; it’s been years now; just reminding You!

A frustrated husband brings his best friend home for dinner unannounced after work. His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.

“My hair and makeup aren’t done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I’m still in my pajamas and I can’t be bothered with cooking tonight! What the hell did you bring him home for?”

“Because he’s thinking of getting married!” the husband replies.

A couple was having dinner at a fancy restaurant. As the food was served, the frustrated husband said, “The food looks delicious, let’s eat.”

The wife said, “Honey, you say a prayer before eating at home.”

“That’s at home, sweetheart,” the husband replied. “Here the chef knows how to cook.”

Best slogan on a frustrated husband’s T-shirt: Please Do Not Disturb me. I am married and already very disturbed.